Santeria
by flowerchild1313
Summary: Spike is left alone in the graveyard and wonders whats next. This is my version of how Spike went from alone and wet to Asteriod Blues. R for potty mouths and inappropriate situations.
1. Anyways

AN: This is a really long note but its worth reading. I don't know what happened between the time Julia left Spike and Asteroid Blues. I don't know if the series covers it but if it does I've never seen it, so I decide to make it up, just un case it didn't. I know that the song I choose for this chapter may anger some of you but let me tell you why I choose it. I used the Female Version of Anyways by Dynamite Hack, the male version works but not as well. The song just screams Spike and Julia to me, especially the line: _I wait for you, I always do, its dumb but I want to anyways. So here we are stuck in hell the same old game we know and well I don't mind, anyways_. Since that line fits so well you maybe wondering why I choose the part that states : _To numb to know that I'm happy, without you I'm better off anyways_. Well it goes along with the story I am writing and Agent Orange's The Reluctant Jezebel (which if you haven't already read you should). The whole idea behind Julia's leaving was to make it so there a chance that maybe, just maybe she and Spike could be together. I think Spike might have realized this and been thankful for her to do it but at the same time just not understand. If you don't get my point of view, I don't blame you, most people don't. But if you do I highly suggest you download this song, female or male version. One last note I would like to give Agent Orange credit of this story, when I was rereading The Reluctant Jezebel and the idea came to me. I used a couple of her ideas so she deserves credit.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

****

ANYWAYS

__

Been sittin' here.

Had another beer.

I'm drunk but I want one anyways.

Too numb to know, that I'm happy,

Without you I'm better off anyways.

Spike stumbled from the graveyard to the nearest bar. He wanted to get drunk as possible. To be so drunk that he would forget everything. He wanted to die. He wanted to kill. He wanted to scream and cry. He wanted, worst of all, Julia. He saw her come, he knew what she was sent to do, then he saw her leave. He saw her make the hardest choice she would ever make. He saw her leave him, in attempt to save the both of them. He wished she would have carried out Vicious's orders. He would rather be dead than without her. When he first saw her, back to him running as far as she could get in the rain, he almost chased after her. He could have easily caught up with her. But he didn't move, he couldn't. His body, and mind, had gone completely numb. The rain soaked through his skin and into his bones but he didn't feel the least bit wet. He couldn't think, he couldn't not think. He had gone completely numb.

Spike didn't know what to do. At first he stood there, motionless. After about a half hour of staring in the direction she had ran, though he would never admit it to anyone, he cried. He had only cried twice before and he didn't know exactly what to do about it. He knew one thing though, nothing good could come of it. So that was when he decided the only solution would to be to get as drunk as hell. Then maybe after that he would find a dark hole to spend the night in.

The closest bar was a small, dark place that he had never been before. It was shabby, bottom of the bin type bar. The best place to drink until you pass out. Spike had stopped crying awhile ago but his eyes were still a bit puffy. He sat down in the only free barstool, in between an extremely fat guy with hundreds of tattoos and a small girl, drinking water, who looked completely out of place. He ordered a beer and sat, drowning in sorrow. He drank beer after beer and soon reached his goal, he was as drunk as hell. He was yelling and causing a scene. Screaming Julia's name and pounding on the bar. The bartender asked him politely to calm down but the only response he got was, "Give me another beer."

"Sir, I'm not so sure that's a good idea."

"Maybe I didn't make myself clear. Get me another beer NOW!" He shoved some cash into the bartenders hand. The bartender looked at him with pity as he refilled his mug. He brought Spike his beer and he downed it in about a second. Then he lay his head down on the bar, and once again, started to cry. Just barely, only a tear came out every few minutes, but it was still crying. He banged on the bar a bit then stopped moving completely. The girl next to him looked at him. 

__

'Is he dead?' She placed her hand on top of the angry man's green afro. "Hey…"

The man jolted. "Julia?" He jumped up and practically yelled it. There was a glimmer of hope in his voice. The woman smiled at him sadly.

"No, I am sorry. My name is October. I just wanted to see if you were o.k." She was strangley pretty. She was probably about ten pounds over weight and her hair was just a little bit puffy. Her eyes were dark brown, almost black at a glance. She looked young, barely twenty-one, and she was dressed in a floral print 60's style dress. She was the description of weird. But despite the extra ten pounds, the slight poof, and the weird clothes, there was something beautiful about her. Maybe it was the way she looked at people, like she really _really _cared. Maybe it was the slight smile that always played on her lips. Maybe it was the fact her dark brown eyes with black streaks hinted at something more. Maybe it was that everything about her screamed I'm me and I love it and even if you hate it I still love you. Or maybe it was her boobs. None of that mattered though because Spike was so hammered and heart broken that he wouldn't notice. He studied her for a moment, trying to focus enough to see what she looked like. After realizing he was to drunk for her to look like anything more than a oil painting he banged his head back on the bar.

He only had his head up for a moment but it was long enough for October to notice that one of his eyes was slightly lighter than the other, and that, despite the fact that he was drunk and smelled of tobacco, he was fairly attractive. Not that it meant anything to her but she was a girl, contrary to popular belief. "Are…"

"On't alk u e." Spike groaned into his arms.

"Well if you actually are going to talk to me then maybe you should try talking to my face and not your arms. I understand you are upset but your arms are not going to do you a bit of good and I just may be able to." She said it in a stern yet caring voice that made Spike look up in confusion.

"For your information," he alleged, "I happen to like the company of my arms." He gave her a drunk, angry smirk. She didn't have the slightest clue what to think of it. He threw his head back on the table. She took a sip of her water and stared at him. She heard soft, muffled sobs, trying their best to stay concealed. She put her hand on his shoulder. "What," but before she could even finish he jumped up and started daggers at her.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Her hands felt like Julia's. Spike couldn't take seeing another woman. But this woman was determined to piss him off. She grabbed his arm so that he couldn't go back to laying on it. "DO.."

"Don't talk to me like that." She practically growled it. "I am worried about you and I do not want you to drown in your self pity."

Spike stood up. He wasn't sure what to think. He was almost honored but over all he was angry. "WHAT THE FUCK RIGHT DO YOU HAVE WORRING ABOUT ME? ITS NONE OF YOUR BUISNESS. MAYBE I _WANT_ TO DROWN!" He stared down at her. She stood up and stared right back at him. She was about a foot shorter than him but still somewhat scary. The whole bar watched as the started at each other, they seemed to be telepathically communicating. Then Spike's eyes swelled up, he looked like he was going to cry. But he passed out instead. October, small as she was caught him and laid him on his side.

"Someone, get me a wet paper towel! The rest of you, mind your own business." Everyone went back to drinking and the bartender grabbed a wet cloth and handed it to October. She held him on his side with his head in her lap. She put the wet cloth on his forehead and kept an eye on his breathing while holding a thumb on his wrist, checking his pulse. She sat there, looking over him, until he awoke.

Julia and Spike's first kiss. Vicious and Spike fighting side by side. The day he first met Vicious. Hmmmmm, hmmmm, hm, hm. He could hear Julia humming. "Jules." He just barely breathed. Then he opened his eyes to she the strange girl holding him. He tried to sit up quickly but she held him down. 

"No. You are to weak. You just threw up half of your body weight. You have been out for hours. I was really worried. Please do not yell, I just want to help you." Her voice and eyes had acquired a softness comparable to a feather pillow. Then Spike remembered what happened, and despite his strong will, tears started pouring out. 

"It is ok." She whispered stroking his arm. "Marty," she called to the bartender, "get some water, a bagel, and a fruit cocktail for our fried her. He could use some food." She smiled sweetly down at Spike. He was quiet angry about how some strange chick had taken him under her wing but he was to weak to retaliate and her smile could touch even the coldest heart. He would like to turn her down but, as much as he didn't want to believe it, he could use any help he could get. He was surprised someone was bothering to be so friendly to him. They would have to know he was a killer, a syndicate member. This girl must have seen him on the news. He had even told her off a couple of times. But here she was, still, helping him, and she didn't even know his name. He remembered a moment during there "staring contest" at which a glimmer of pain shone in her eyes. He had a feeling she knew hardship. She had a tortured soul. She had seen Spike completely, for everything he was. She saw just what was going on in his brain. It scared him, but he needed a friend. One who had no idea who he was.

"Spike." He said with all the strength he could muster. Its hard to imagine Spike weak, being as he's seemingly invincible, but mental pain isn't as easy to ignore as physical, even though he was trying as hard as he could.

"I know you name is Spike… Thanks Marty… open wide" she spooned some fruit cocktail into him mouth. "You are dead. It was on the news. You were involved in some bad stuff. Guess you are better off dead." October smiled. 

'Does she know of the pain she's causing me. Maybe she doesn't understand that I'm heartbroken. That with every bit of care she gives me my soul withers more.' Spike stared off into space, trying to ignore the caring girl.

"Whatcha' ya' thinkin' about?" She looked at him quizzically. She had a feeling that she was making him suffer, that he probably wasn't up for some little girl caring for him. But he needed help and she couldn't leave him. Why? She wasn't sure, but she knew there was a reason that she was there and he was there at the same moment. It wouldn't have happened that way if nothing was meant to happen.

He looked up at her. He thought about telling her what he was actually thinking but she was trying so hard to be a help, he didn't wasn't to hurt her to bad.

"I'm thinking that you are pissing me off a great deal. I just got out of a bad ordeal and I don't need a woman helping me." Whops, Freudian slip. He smiled. "I'm also thinking that I'm lucky to have some beautiful stranger care about me more than most of the people who know me." She blushed a little bit but she also felt really bad. 

"Should I stop? Just leave you hear to rot?"

"…..No….I'm weak and…. well alone." He sighed a bit. He had a feeling he would regret saying that. She fed him until he said he could take no more. Then he fell asleep. At this point they had been sitting on the floor of the bar for about five hours. Everyone was whispering about them but they took no notice. She watched him sleeping. He was breathing rapidly

"…Vicious… Ju.. Julia!" He just barely breathed. He was having a nightmare. Julia and Vicious together. That's why she had run from him. To go back. October lightly shook him.

"Wake up Spike! I think you are having a nightmare…" After a couple of shakes he bolted up, eyes wide. After a minute or so his breathing slowed down.

"I think I'm feeling a bit better. I'm ok now, so I guess I'll get going."

"To where? It is about four a.m. and if I am correct you have nowhere to go." Spike sighed.

"I'll find somewhere."

"They will be looking for you."

They had a brief eye conversation then October spoke. "I live in a ship orbiting this planet. I don't have many friends and space is so beautiful so I took to living out there. I think you would be safe there for awhile." Spike looked skeptical. "I have a couple of spare bedrooms and plenty of food. I also have a little mini-gym." she added.

Spike stood up and gave her a cold look. She stood up, matching it. Then he stumbled a bit and gave her a quick o.k.

"Here let me give you a hand." She helped hold him steady, which was nearly impossible given the height difference, and helped him toward the door.

"Marty, I'm out."

"Kay, see ya October. Come around again soon." He stared at the odd couple as they staggered out the door.


	2. Strawberry

AN: First I would like to apologize for the errors in my first chapter. I was so excited and in such a hurry to post it that I only went over it once. If there are any errors in this chapter I'm sorry. I went over it three times but they always manage to sneak in. This chapter is long. I was going to make it longer but I deiced against it. I think that this is going to be a long story! I hope you can bear through it though because I think it will turn out nice. I used the song Strawberry by Everclear. The song describes October and Spikes' relationship at this point pretty well. Its another one of those songs you have to look at in a different light but in my mind it works. I'm kinda making up Spike's past as I see fit and I think (hope) its working. Well don't let me keep you any longer! Read on and enjoy!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

****

Strawberry

__

Never been here, never coming back

Never want to think about the things

That happened today

Want to lay down on

the warm ground

I think I'm going to need

A little time to myself

Spike and October stumbled out of the bar. It was a little past four a.m. and the road was completely empty. They looked an odd pair walking down the street; a short sweet-looking young girl and a tall drunk man with a green afro. "I am parked at the deck down the street. This is my motorcycle over here. Are you going to be able to hold on to me???" Spike could barely stand up, she doubted that he would be able to hang on to her while they were going 90 miles an hour. "When I ride my cousin on my bike I usually have her sit in front of me since she is to little to hold on. If you sat in the front I could hold you on."

Spike stared at her in disbelief. He wasn't so weak that he would sink as low to ride in front of a little on a motorcycle. He was quite surprised to see she even had a motorcycle. She really didn't seem like the type. That was when he noticed the old, scuffed up Harley boots she was wearing. 

"Harley. Old one too. What year?"

"2003. You like? It was my great-great-granddads." She looked proudly at her baby. It was the 100th anniversary bike. There weren't many nice motorcycles around anymore and she took pride in having a nice, old Harley.

"They're nice bikes, especially the older ones. I think I can hold on to you." It really was a nice bike, of course there had been many, more beautiful ones in 2003. It was a nice year for custom bikes and Spike had seen a few pictures of some really nice ones. He was never really a biker dude but some guys in the syndicate were and the old custom bikes were legend to them. He used to flip through their magazines and try and decide which ones he would like to ride.

October gave Spike a lopsided smile. She saw the look he gave her when she suggested he ride in front. "Well, I guess even dead people have pride, and I would not want to hurt it would I?" She laughed a little. Spike wasn't sure if he should laugh or yell at her. In the end he decided on smirking, it was funny how well she saw him. October grabbed her helmet out of the side bag and put it on her head, it was the kind that covered your entire face like a mask. She sure was a sight, Harley boots, hippie dress, and a motorcycle helmet. She dug in her bag a little then pulled out another helmet. It wasn't nearly as cool as hers but it would do the job. Most people considered her a reckless rider but she had never once gotten in an accident. Still, she always wore a helmet and demanded her riders did.

"Here. Put it on. You can never be too safe." Spike really didn't want to but he had no idea if she was dangerous or not so he grabbed it and shoved it on his head, or attempted to shove it on his head. His hair wasn't cooperating with the idea of safety. 

October laughed. "I was going to drive slow anyways. So I am sure you will be fine. How do you get your hair to stick up like that?"

Spike rolled his eyes. "If I could get it to stay down I would but it has a mind of its own. I could get it cut but I'm starting to like the fact that I am one of the few proud owners of a green afro." He ran his fingers though his hair with a silly smile.

October sat on the bike. "Hop on." For a minute Spike though about running away from this weirdo, but he decided against it. She was intriguing. Plus, he had always wanted to ride a motorcycle. Very reluctantly he, unstably, jumped onto the back seat of the Harley. At first he held on to October very lightly and awkwardly but once she started the motorcycle he held her so tightly she couldn't breathe. She was going about 100 miles an hour and zooming from once side of the street to another. She drove like Julia did when they were fleeing the scene of a crime.

"I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO GO SLOW!" Spike yelled over the roaring engine. October screeched to a stop and flipped the visor on her helmet open.

"That was slow." She looked confused.

"Well my stomach is about a mile behind us and I think I might have shit my pants." Spike breathed heavily. "I think about 50 miles per hour would be better."

"Are you crazy?!? I have never gone _that_ slow. But you are the weak one, so I guess I _could_." She flipped her helmet closed and started down the street.

"OH YEAH," Spike screamed over the sound, "THIS MIGHT BE A LITTLE TOO MUCH TO ASK OF YOU BUT COULD YOU STAY ON ONE SIDE OF THE ROAD." She nodded and Spike relaxed. It's not that he was scared but he was already feeling pretty sick and 100 miles per hour on your first time is never a good idea. The ride became quite pleasant after October had calmed down. It gave Spike some time to think. He relaxed his grip on October and leaned back a bit. He wanted to forget everything that had happed that night. he wanted to run off into the dark and pretend nothing happened. He wanted to forget about Julia, he wanted to forget about the bar and October, he wanted to forget he was Spike. He could never forget about Julia, it just wasn't possible, October sure as hell wouldn't be letting him forget her or that damned bar anytime soon, and forgetting who he was just wasn't an option, not at this point. They rode past the grave yard. Spike felt a tear coming on so he started to scream.

"WOOOOOO HOOOOOO!"

"Spike, you have no right to scream, we are going 50 miles an hour. And you are going to wake everyone up." He gave her an evil glare. Then laughed a bit.

He pulled himself closer to her and whispered into the little holes in her helmet "I think you are insane." 

"What makes you think that." she snapped.

"Well, you are a pretty young girl and you were in a bar full of guys. You dress like a hippie and drive a motorcycle. You live in space. You picked up a total stranger, a dangerous one at that. You took care of him for a few hours and now you're taking him home. You talk weird and about weird stuff. You are just over all insane. Trust me, insane people can always spot their kind." October laughed. She elbowed him a little bit. He leaned back in his seat again and stared up at the sky trying not to think. He always though of it as a really big connect the dots sheet. He and Julia would point out shapes they saw in the stars. '_Stop thinking about Julia,'_ Spike warned himself.

They were at her ship in no time. She paid the parking fee and drove her motorcycle up the vehicle ramp. Her ship was old too. Probably form 2040. Spike walked around her ship as she closed the hatch up and started to program it. It was big and roomy, _and_ well decorated. The living room looked like a sixties pad. The kitchen looked very modern and hip. The bedrooms had a homey mothers touch and the gym was full of work out equipment and was happy and colorful. She had a study/library that reminded him of a school he once attended before his parents died.

"Where did you get the money for all this?" Spike asked her as she programmed her ship's orbit. "I noticed you had some old cars too. A van and a little car."

"I act and write." she said, plopping down on the couch. Spike sat at the other end and propped his feet up on her table. "I do a lot of independent films. I have had to do at least one on every planet. I also have a couple of best selling books. I donate a lot to worthy causes but I still have plenty left to live a life I love."

"You're a best selling writer and an actress but you don't have many friends?" Spike found that hard to believe. Most famous people were, well, popular.

"Well, I have fans. I use a penname for both, Mila Vantearea, so none of them know who I am really. I have met a lot of people through the business but most of them do not like me or do not get me. They think I am out land-ish and weird. I agree but at least I am a talented out land-ish weird person."

"Mila Vantearea? I've seen one of your movies. Julia made me watch it. You played this mob member trying to escape with the one you loved. She said it described our situation perfectly. In the end you and your lover died. It gave us a bad feeling."

"Oh, you saw Runaway With Me? That was one of my favorites. The story line is so great, not to mushy, not to manly and all around depressing and brilliant. The stuff love stories are made of. I actually helped write that one. Main reason I got the lead." She looked quizzically at him then, with a new tone of voice, softly asked "So….. who is this Julia and what exactly is going on?"

Spike wanted to start laughing. That movie was his life story and he was sitting on the couch with one of the writers and actresses. Two syndicate members fall in love ,try to get away and die. Could it be more of a coincidence? "Well watch your movie and you'll have a pretty good idea what's going on in my life." 

She laughed. "Really?!?"

"Yeah, except my story has a twist. See, my best friend since I was a child, Vicious, met Julia at a bar and asked her for some help. She did help us and eventually she joined the syndicate. She and Vicious started having sex. Vicious may have been in love with her, I'm not sure. But in the end she was in love with me and I was in love with her. We were going to escape but Vicious found out about it all. He tried to kill me. Then he sent Julia to kill me. I was standing in the graveyard, where she was to meet me, so that we could finally escape. I saw her from awhile off, I don't think she knew I saw her. She was holding a gun at me. Then she turned and ran. She didn't want to kill me but she knew that if we ran off together Vicious would know where we would be. So she ran her way and I ran mine. In the end we'll die. Just like in the movies." As he said this, tears escaped from his eyes but at the same time he laughed a bit. He was laughing and crying. 

October grabbed his hand. "Oh my! I am so sorry. I… I wish there was something I could do. That movie is not my favorite anymore. Oh… oh… I'm… I just…" She sighed. "Why don't you take a shower and go to sleep. You are going to have one hell of a hangover tomorrow and it is about time you let this horrible day of yours end." She pulled him up, still holding his hand and squeezing it to emphasize certain words. They walked a bit down the hall and arrived at his room. 

"You can sleep in the room next to mine, then I can hear you if you start to scream out in a nightmare or something. There is a shower in there and I will bring you some pajamas. Can you sleep in boxers? Do not worry, I have never worn them without underwear and they are clean. If there are not supplies in your shower let me know. There should be but just in case there is not… I can bring you some clothes to wear while yours get clean. I have a lot of guy clothes." 

"Boxers are fine. I wear a 28."

"Ok, I think I have some in that size. Just hop in the shower and I will leave them and some clothes for tomorrow on your bed." She walked away and Spike entered his room. It was quite nice. The walls were blue and sponge painted white. There was a big comfy, colorful bed next to one of the walls. There was a little door at the edge of the room. Guessing it was the bathroom he tried to open it but it wouldn't budge. 

He groaned, trying to push it open, figuring it was stuck or something. 

"DON'T TOUCH THAT!" October screamed. She sounded scared. It freaked Spike out to hear her yell in an eerie high pitch voice, a sound he never imagined to come out of her. Her eyes shone with fear and pain. 

"Errrr… sorry."

"No, I am. I should not have freaked out. That door is the bathroom. Will these boxers do?" She held up a pair of boxers covered with bunnies. Spike started to laugh.

"Yeah! I couldn't have asked for a cooler pair. Is there a chance you have them in pink?" October started to giggle.

"You sure are a weird one Spike." She threw the boxers and clothes on his bed and walked out of his room shaking her head. "Try and get some sleep." she called from the hall. "Come get me if you need anything. I will be trying to get to sleep in the room to your left. Good night, sleep tight, and do not let the bed bugs bite!" He stared at the door where she had just been and shook his head. 

__

'She's a nutcase, but I don't mind.' He stared at the door he was trying to open. _'Hmmm, I wonder…. Naaaa, I'll check it out later. I'm pretty tired_.' He opened the door to the bathroom and stood there, stunned. There was a beautiful marble tub and a nice shower stall. 

"_'he must be making millions, or she just doesn't donate much. No, she probably donates a lot. It just seems like something she would do_.' He headed toward the shower and walked into the stall. He turned the water on hot and turned the water pressure all the way up. It felt so good. The hot water pounding on his back. He thought about Julia. 

"Julia…" he sighed. They had once taken a shower together. It had been only a little while after they realized they were in love. He smiled remembering how embarrassed she had been to walk in the bathroom while he was showering. He ripped the towel she was wearing off and gently pulled her in. She blushed a little but she didn't try to get away. It was one of his best memories. He cried a little more then vowed it would be his last time. Crying wouldn't change anything. He smiled again, remembering the shower so long ago, when things were good. 

The water turned cold and he stepped out of the shower. Water dripped off of his body all over the floor. He dried off and put on his bunny boxers. He spotted the outfit she brought for him. A pair of worn jeans and a t-shirt that said "I'm the person my parents warned me about." He tossed the outfit on the dresser and crawled in between the soft covers. He looked up at the clock, it was 6:00 a.m.

"I won't be up till about 3:00 p.m." He sighed and closed his eyes preparing for a night of nightmares.


End file.
